Making Friends at University: Beyond Clubs and Pubs

Starting university can feel like a fresh start for many students. It also represents a huge journey into the unknown that can be daunting, which leads to the common question: how do you actually make friends here? This can be especially true for those that aren’t drawn to clubbing, bar crawls, or big social gatherings.

This guide is the students that want to enjoy something a little different during their time at university. So, let’s go and have some fun!

Why Making Friends Can Feel Harder Than Expected

It can be easy to imagine friendships forming naturally, perhaps over coffee queues, shared modules, or group projects. In reality, many students find themselves navigating new environments alone when their interests don’t align with the typical social norms of university life.

Students from alternative backgrounds can sometimes feel out of sync with what’s going on in and around campus:

• Some go home after lectures and miss out on evening hang outs.
• Older students can feel out of touch with their younger counterparts.
• International students may face cultural or language barriers.
• First generation students might not have family guidance on how university works from a social standpoint.

If you’re naturally more introverted, heading for a wild night on the town just isn’t appealing. That’s perfectly fine, because university is designed to cater to everyone.

Start With Shared Routines, Not Shared Interests

While “finding people who like what you like” is still great advice, a good starting point is to locate those with a similar routine to you.

If you notice you’re in the same place at the same time regularly, the groundwork for connection is already there.

Try this:

• Sit in the same seat for each of your lectures.
• Study in the same spot on campus every day for a while.
• Attend regular tutorials, even if you’ve no pressing matters to discuss.

These simple things may seem strange at first, but they help create visibility and consistency. Over time, you’ll recognise the same faces and be able to start small talk naturally.

Use Your Coursework Strategically

Seminars and groups tasks aren’t just academic proposals. They’re ready made social labs.

Instead of treating group work as a tick box exercise, be proactive:

• Volunteer to create a group chat.
• Suggest a shared online document.
• Ask to meet up in person instead of just chatting online.

These moves show reliability which plenty of people find a valuable asset in a friend. Some will just appreciate the gesture, even if they don’t intend to contribute much themselves.

Volunteer for Micro Roles

If the idea of joining a society sounds like your worst nightmare, consider committing to something a little smaller. You’ll also gain valuable professional skills that could help you out after graduation.

Check your university website to see what can of positions are available. The kind of roles you can expect to find are student reps, and campus open day monitors.

You’ll work with a team of fellow students that have all taken time out of their day to do something helpful for their community, so you’ll have plenty to talk about!

Use Digital Space to Your Benefit

Platforms such as Messenger, WhatsApp, and even Slack can be used to connect with your new flatmates and coursemates ahead of time. Many universities will add you to a chat with your fellow students so that you can get to know each other digitally before meeting up in person.

This is a great way to find out what people are like before you arrive, and potentially arrange some meet ups once you’re there. View them as modern day noticeboards that you can use to advertise yourself to the world. Just make sure to save your best for your first day though!

Explore Your Campus and City

Making friends at university doesn’t always mean joining an official event or club. Sometimes, inviting someone to do nothing together can be just as good an idea.

• Ask one of your flatmates if they want to go for a walk around the local park.
• See if anyone wants to grab lunch between lectures.
• Explore the campus or a nearby neighbourhood as a group.

These casual plans create a relaxed vibe that can be used to get to know each other better.

It’s important to remember that your city isn’t limited to campus. Your new home can offer a rich network of opportunities for you to grow both personally and professionally.

Explore the range of part time jobs available to students, you could meet some great colleagues or customers that you get on well with. Then, hit up some contemporary coffee shops or museums to make the city your playground without the need for a night out.

If you’re in need of some ideas for what to do in your city, take a read through our helpful city pages. 

Friendships Don’t Have to Be Fast

You really don’t need to have a huge circle of friends at university, many past students will tell you that making friends at university is about the quality of friendship over the quantity. This is a mantra to live by during your time as a student, so there’s no need to force a friendship that isn’t really what you want.

Stay open to new opportunities, and remember that the best kind of people are those that love you for who you are. Anything else is a bonus!

See you at the library, the café, or maybe just on your way to a lecture.